My Two Selves

Sometimes I feel that I am my two selves

Sometimes I feel that I am my two selves!
There is this one, who's shy, cocooned in her hard shell
Perceptive, sensitive, and vulnerable
There is another tough me, out to fight the world and excel.

There is one who has little room for unworthy emotions
Value based rationale and focused on transactions
Yet the other one refuses to write-off selfless affection
And preserves tears for compassion and devotion.

A part of me insists hard facts over fables anytime
No prose, no poetry, sharp specifics thus define
Words entrenched with fervour still wake me up at midnight
Verses flow over the tab like a flooded river, in my twin paradigm.

Longing to soak in the sun and the first shower of rain
Serenaded by the chirping birds, feeling the dew on the windowpane.
Then opening my eyes to the reality so unforgiving
Also, keeping them shut to continue my dream.

Power and fame stopped impressing me long ago
Then bylines of loving folks why feed my distinguished ego
Demon of success still fills me with magnitude
Yet peace and serenity comes from soulful solitude.

Submitting to shackles in the name of protection
Accepting compromise as the formula for bliss in haven
Yet a free spirit infuses the need for autonomy
Feet ready to groove all night to a new symphony.

Curious like a little child, ready to explore life
Marveling at this enigmatic world, feeling so naïve
Yet holding the universe of experience in my gaze
To question the rubrics and offer answers in a haze.

The soft breeze with an ability to turn a windmill
Passionate though imperious, spark within concealed
Solid though permeable, malleable yet brittle
Is this the two selves in me …
Or just me in metamorphosis, in qua of being dual.

Author: Mandeep Caur
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